New year, new start? Other than a purely psychological shift, there really is no difference between the change from 2009 to 2010. Yesterday was Thursday, and today is Friday. No magic, no transition, no difference. Except that there is. The new year is simply a reminder, a global trigger to look backwards and forwards, at what has been, and what may be.
2009 was supposed to be my self proclaimed 'Year of Change.' It was the mental kick in the ass that I set myself to really try, really do something about what was, and is, important to me. And yet, here I find myself, once again, at essentially the same place I was last year. No great changes. Health, wealth, faith, and mind are all still where they were, with a few small progressions, but hardly what I qualify as change.
I have restarted the Stoic Studies with the College, and so far have stuck to it for 2 months. I have made some promises to work on the DP, more as a test of my faith, then as a confirmation of it. It would be so easy to just drop it and walk away, and say it wasnt for me. But then it would be the same thing. Perhaps I should not give up quite so easily. Perhaps that is the change, the greatest change in me, to stop changing my mind on a whim. Perhaps that is what 2009 has granted me, an sense of exhausition from the inability, or more truthfully the unwillingness, to stay with a plan, any plan.
So despite the call to change, to walk a new path (are there any?) perhaps that is what 2010 offers me. A chance to NOT change, to stay, to commit, if only for the year.
We shall see.
1 comment:
Mr. Daw,
I very much enjoyed your entry today. I think maybe I feel quite the same way. I search and search and "Eureka, I've found it"; only to wander off to something else. For 2010, I too want to Not make change, but to stick with what I have. I have the tools for the good life; I simply need to practice them on a daily basis; day after day. Thank you for a "push" in the right direction. I look forward to future posts.
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