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What more could you ask for?

I was reading my last post, and it struck me that my 'list' might sound like boasting. It isn't. All I am saying is that through great luck and some effort, I was able to accomplish what so many at my age are still striving for. It isn't that I am ungrateful.

That's not it at all. I am very lucky. I was born in a great country, into a great family. Despite, or perhaps because, of choices I have made, things have turned out this way. I just want to find out why.

It isn't due to dissatisfaction, or boredom, or greed. I have tasted richness and depth and, though rarely, transcendence. I have traveled to some pretty amazing places, accomplished some cool things, eaten some weird food, and met some interesting people. Compared to my day to day life though, all of those things pale in importance.

I am not about to start filling my life with additional goals that serve no purpose besides spending what ever time and disposable income I have left. Having reached this amazing point in my life, I am asking myself what it is all for. What is the purpose of all of this?

I have been lightly reading philosophy, especially Stoicism, and I am well versed in Christian thought. I have read and toyed with atheism. I have had the briefest introduction to eastern religion and philosophy, though what I have learned appears interesting. Though they appear to have much in common, they approach the goal of life in different ways.

A brief overview seems to produce one of five possible answers to my quest.

1. Asking 'What is the purpose of life?' is a false question. It is like asking 'what is the scent of blue?' It sounds like a question grammatically, but logically it is senseless. There is no purpose. Despite our advances in technology, "the life of man, solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short."
2. The key purpose in life is to enrich and protect those things that are important to me. It is to find out what I love and am passionate about, and experience as much of that as possible. Find and embrace beauty and pleasure, avoid pain.
3. Make myself a better person, aiming at the excellence that I was born with. Learn more, get stronger, think more clearly. Study, exercise, write, produce beautiful things for the sheer joy of it.
4. Be useful. Make this world a better place for having been in it. Give my children what I didn't have. Help the poor. Work towards social justice.
5. Prepare myself for the world to come, for my next life, for the hereafter. Cleanse myself of sin/illusion/karma to join with the divine. Get my soul ready for the next great adventure, after I die. 

I will explore these five approaches to finding meaning in my life, likely with frequent sidebars into other topics as they present themselves.

What is the Purpose of Life?

I have been thinking about life over the past few days. More than usual.

I am approaching my 50th birthday, and my health is not at its best. Beside that, though, I have pretty much everything that most people seem to be aiming for.

• I have a stable job that pays well and that I enjoy doing
• I have a few close friends who make me laugh, provide a safety net for me, and who I care for and about.
• My weight is really the only health problem I have, with most of my other issues (which are admittedly minor) stemming from it. My vision is good, my hearing passes, and I have full mobility.
• I have a home that needs work, but successfully keeps my family and I warm and dry. More than this, it is actually unusually large property for the area. Finally it is my grandfather's home.
• I have important books overflowing my bookshelves, music that would fill days to listen to, and enough access to information and entertainment to fill several lifetimes.
• MOST importantly, I have a partner, wife, best friend who walks alongside, and frequently supports me. My children are wonderful people in their own right, my brothers both talk to me, and I get along very well with my in-laws. Family is great.

So what is my problem? Having all of these things in my life, how can I not be satisfied? How can I not be happy?

That is just it. I am satisfied! I am very happy! I am grateful on a daily basis, and I take the time to express my love and gratitude to all who need to hear it.

But I still wonder... what of it. It won't last, it will change. I know that, and I accept it. I know that death is real, and close and personal, and so I prepare myself for it as best I can. But I don't fear it. There would be no point.

The old Roman cry of "Eat, drink and be merry! For tomorrow we die!" rings hollow in my ears. True, we die, but we also live. And while we are alive... we must LIVE.

So. That is the question. What IS the purpose/aim/goal/meaning of life?

I plan to continue exploring this question in the following blog posts.

THE SINEWS OF A STOIC PHILOSOPHER

THE SINEWS

OF A STOIC PHILOSOPHER

by Michel Daw

~

A poem inspired from Epictetus, Discourses, II.8

~

Faithful, modest, and tranquil
With nobility undeterred
A desire undisappointed
And aversions unincurred

Pursuits duly exerted
Assents unerringly made
Resolutions carefully taken
And life embraced unafraid

A Hazardous Life

A Hazardous Life

I have a horror of rest;
Possessions encourage one to indulge in it.
And there is nothing like security
For making one fall asleep.

I like life well enough
To want to live it awake.
And so in the very midst of my riches
I maintain the sensation of a state of precariousness,
By which means I aggravate,
Or at any rate, intensify
My Life.

I will not say I like danger
But I like life to be hazardous.
And I want it to demand at every moment
The whole of my happiness
My courage
My health.

From André Gide's L'immoraliste (1902)/The immoralist (1953)

An Epicurean Day

  6:00 -   1. Wake Up. Set the frame of the day,
  2. Shower, shave, clean clothes in good condition.
  6:30 -  3. Breakfast, inspiration, news & review of the day ahead.
  7:15 - 4. Brisk walk, warm up, connect with outside.
  7:30 - 5. Commute to work - work related audio
  8:00 -  6. Arrive at work. Review and Plan for the morning's work.
  9:00 - 7. Work on MITs and Big Rocks
12:00 - 8. BREAK for lunch, different venue and input.
12:30 -   9. Plan for the following day & week
13:00 - 10. Complete remaining tasks.
16:30 - 11. Commute from work - education or entertainment audio
17:00 - 12. Exercise and wind down.
18:00 - 13. Dine with friends and family, enjoy the meal and company
19:30 - 14. Games, entertainment and projects
21:30 - 15. Prepare for the next day and go to sleep.

A day without aim.

This day has been a simple one. I spent most of the day at home, ostensibly sick. It is a short week, in a ddition to that. I haven't started the week's lesson yet, not have I started editing next week's lesson/ Although it is only Tuesday, I somehow feel that the week is getting away from me.

The discussion on the ISF continues on, though no one has chaged theri mind about their position, but the work itself has helped my to focus

Getting seriously tired. 

The Symphony of Life

You know, I have say how much I appreciate these challenges and interchanges. You all force me to examine and re-examine my assumptions, and to defend the positions I have taken on some issues. I certainly hope those of you who are taking part in this interchange derive as much benefit, and pleasure, as I do. And I thank you for the time you take in your responses.

That being said, I see something completely different from the Dawkins passage than either Gich or Grant has. It may not be what Dawkins entirely meant (I cannot vouch for that), but it serves to illustrate my position well.

Let us leave the question of the ebb and flow of energy and matter for the moment, and work our way there by analogy. Music is very dear to me, and I believe serves as a good illustration of my point. Music is made up of certain discreet notes, of differing lengths and tone. Instrumentation provides additional nuances of voice and colour. Moreover, the interconnection between notes can be complex, from the pointed staccato to the lazy glissando. The combination of many notes can constitute one of several chords, which lend a resonance and richness to the sound. Finally all of these can be considered and combined to create a unique composition. I was trying this concept out on my daughter tonight, and she immediately understood the application of the analogy. "Each of us are symphonies!"

Or let us once again consider the eddy in the stream. The eddy is not a separate thing. It is a combination of the flow of water, the effect of gravity and of the stream bed, and several other factors. The eddy may stay in place for moments, or persist for years. Yet the water that makes up that eddy is never the same, from moment to moment. 

And so to return to part of the quote: "Not a single atom that is in your body today was there when that event took place .... Matter flows from place to place and momentarily comes together to be you. Whatever you are, therefore, you are not the stuff of which you are made."

We seem to have got hung up on equating ourselves with the 'stuff', which Dawkins clearly states we are not. So what is 'us'? What is the person, this ephemeral locus of thought and choice? I believe there is a clue in the quote (whether it is intentional or not, I cannot say).

It is not what the matters 'is' that is the focus, but what the matter 'does'. It flows, it comes together and pools for a time. Like the symphony, it is not the notes, but the way, the pattern, in which those notes are interrelated. It is the flow of the melody from chord to chord. Like the eddy, it isn't the water, but the combination of forces, environment and the very nature of water itself that bring the eddy into being. 

We are not merely a pile of atoms. We are a dance, a complex web of energies and matter, a unique comic symphonic movement, brought together for a short time. The atoms change, but the pattern they form holds, if only for a moment, cosmically speaking. Something endures, something that is uniquely you, the melody of your thoughts, the harmony or discordance of your choices, all of these things remains as the energy and matter of the cosmos flow through you, and around you and are within you.

I like this quote from Carl Sagan, which summarizes my perseptive beautifully. "The beauty of a living thing is not the atoms that go into it. But the way those atoms are put together."

Does this mean that I believe that the universe is entirely deterministic (I may not be using the correct philosophical term here)? If we use that term to mean void of the capacity for choice, I don't think so. We all act as if our actions are self-guided, and we certainly hold others accountable for their actions. So either we are deluded by a mechanistic universe to believe in the illusion of choice, or there is some spiritual or super-natural forces guiding some or all of the matter in the cosmos. 

Or the capacity for choice is a property of the universe. I believe I said this before, but my son, having studied Stoicism briefly in university as part of a philosophical survey course, once asked me if I believed the universe was conscious. I replied that I know that 'part' of it was, and that therefore the capacity for consciousness is part of the makeup of the cosmos. In the same way, I see nothing to prevent the power for choice to be part of a corporeal universe. We may not understand the mechanism of it, but that it exists is beyond question for most people. And where there is choice, there the Stoic heg. can have reign. 

I see no reason to imposed additional external layers of influence, either as an organizing or animating principle, if one accepts that these properties are part of universe we live it. It is self organizing as well as self-destructive. The dance is built into the fabric of the cosmos. Things come together, things flow apart. 

It is now 2 AM, and I have to work in the morning, so I am signing off for now.

On Mon, Apr 18, 2011 at 8:33 PM, Grant Sterling  wrote:

I assumed my comments here would be read in the
context of the Dawkins passage, where he holds that
"I" did not really exist during the events that I
now remember, because the atoms that compose my body now
aren't the ones that composed it then.
If I am the pile of atoms that make up my body,
and the pile changes composition with every instant,
then there is no enduring personal identity, and
no personal nature.

--
Cheers,

Michel

"If one accomplishes some good
though with toil,
the toil passes,
but the good remains;

if one does something dishonorable
with pleasure,
the pleasure passes,
but the dishonor remains."

Musonius Rufus

The Spirit of Stoic Serenity Begins

I have started the Spirit of Stoic Serenity study group up, mostly to vet the training modules I am formulating out of Keith's book. We have just corrected the Introduction, and found several Typos, and I even think a few of them are actually following along.


In light of that, I am also participating in the group. I have long felt that I have not been entirely reliable regarding my own studies. While there has been broad application, it hasn't been complete or consistent.


I am posting more frequently to the ISF list now, and having to justify my beliefs and practices is proving to be a good exercise for me.  Here are a couple of the things of value that I have posted lately.


--------


The following is based, in part, on Becker's A New Stoicism. This list forms the core of my personal practice.

Proposed Core Principles of Modern Stoicism

• Eudaimonistic - identifying the good life or happiness with flourishing, being excellent-of-one’s-kind (i.e. fulfilling the promise of one's nature).
• Intellectualistic - identifying virtue with rationality, carrying out the normative propositions of practical reason. Stemming from this is the affirmation of the formal unity of virtue based on reason.
• Naturalistic - insisting that the substance of practical deliberation be soundly based on facts about the natural world, as explained by the best science we currently have available to us (i.e. Posidonius' continue research into natural phenomena, which led to his rejection of the periodic conflagration)
• Individualistic - emphasizing the possibility and primacy of self-mastery and personal responsibility in light of our interconnection with nature and each other (i.e. Hierocles' concentric circles)

The final three can be seen as the central points of the study Logic, Physics and Ethics.

--------

Why the Discourses have grand themes can only be speculated. Perhaps the notes were taken sequentially. Like any good educator, Epictetus may have focussed on specific areas, and what we see are Arrian's notes following those classes. From what I have read, and this is open to correction, Arrian's notes were not intended for publication (he was a well respected author and historian in his own right), and after they were 'leaked' he just let them stand.

Whatever their original purpose or method of composition may have been, I have had some degree of success using the following method for learning to practice Stoicism.

1. Studying StoicismGeneral Introductions to Stoicism, John Sellars' Stoicism, The Cambridge Companion to the Stoics, Lawrence Becker's A New Stoicism, etc. This was followed by some studies on specific Stoics, Reading Seneca: Stoic Philosophy at Rome (Brad Inwood), Musonius Rufus and Education in the Good Life: A Model of Teaching and Living Virtue (J.T. Dillon), Epictetus: A Stoic and Socratic Guide to Life (A. A. Long), The Inner Citadel: The Meditations of Marcus Aurelius (Pierre Hadot)
2. Journal (suggested by Seneca)Nightly reflection on the day's activities, an honest look back on where I succeeded and where I failed to follow Stoic principles. Other interesting notes find their way in there, such as the Four Principles listed in an earlier email.
3. Reading the StoicsSeneca - Stoic Philosophy of Seneca: Essays and Letters (Moses Hadas)
   Musonius Rufus - Musonius Rufus: Lectures and Sayings (Cynthia King)
   Epictetus - Epictetus: Discourses and Selected Writings (Robert Dobbin)
   Marcus Aurelius - Marcus Aurelius: Meditations (Gregory Hays)
   A compilation of the words of the earlier Stoics, The Stoics Reader: Selected Writings and Testimonia (Brad Inwood & Lloyd P. Gerson)
4. The NotebookAs I read the previous books, I 'took notes', writing down passages that meant a lot to me at this time in my life. I considered myself as sitting in a class, trying to understand what I could, knowing that I would be coming back to theses sources time and time again. The Notebook, like the Journal, is an ongoing practice.
5. The HandbookAfter a time, I started reviewing my Notebook entries and organizing them into the categories listed below. I found it interesting where the trends tended to fall. These were written in my own words, as I tried to distill for this time what I was seeing in the notes I had taken. This is very much a time bound project. I plan to come back and redo this exercise in about 5 years.
6. The Written MeditationThis is the practical outcome of the previous exercise. Handbook 'in hand' I periodically review my Journal, and look for areas that I still have work to do. The important thing about the tone of the meditations is that it is in the second person, an additional teacher as it were. Actually I have found that the 'voice' of the Meditation reflects who the person is, and who they admire.

There is more beyond this, but it is still a work in progress for me. 

-------

One of the key examples of a 'modern' scientific discovery has, in my opinion, led to an important adjustment of some the ancient Stoic approaches. 

The nearly global acceptance of heliocentrism over the last several hundred years has made some of the anthropocentrism of the Stoic writings (i.e. the animals exist for our sake etc.)  less viable. The veritable explosion about data concerning the vastness of the universe has only added to the humbling experience. The universe does not appear to exist for our sake, and it is becoming clearer to more and more people that the earth itself will get along just fine without us, as it had for billions of years before our evolution. 

To me, this only serves to increase the importance of our interdependence. We really only have each other. And at that, for a very short time. It is a sobering thought. And one that informs my Stoic practice directly.

A quote from Dawkins stirs something in me... ""Think of an experience from your childhood. Something you remember clearly, something you can see, feel, maybe even smell, as if you were really there. After all you really were there at the time, weren’t you? How else could you remember it? But here is the bombshell: you weren’t there. Not a single atom that is in your body today was there when that event took place .... Matter flows from place to place and momentarily comes together to be you. Whatever you are, therefore, you are not the stuff of which you are made. If that does not make the hair stand up on the back of your neck, read it again until it does, because it is important."

We share the transient and ephemeral nature of the universe. We are temporary eddies in the flow of matter and energy, clouds of atoms that have formed together. While this thought might make some people feel pointless, to me it is an indication of our place in the universe, because while we may be eddies, we are eddies in a universal stream, and the atoms of the cosmos flow through us, or as Sagan put it, we are made of Star Stuff.

Bracing, but thrilling. 

Alone, Once Again

So I have decided to restart my journal. I am using my blog, but I have made it private. I want to be able to capture my thoughts without filter, without having to second guess myself. This is to be my own review, my judge and jury. One of the things that I have lacked in my Stoic training is any kind of rigor. I have never actually completed any of the levels of my so called training. So here is the first step, again. Keeping a journal.

I was working on posting some of the Discourses to thestoiclife.org and while reading one of them I came across the following:

If you are acting in harmony, show me that, and I will tell you that you are making progress [as a Stoic]; but if out of harmony, begone, and do not confine yourself to expounding your books, but go and write some of the same kind yourself. Epictetus, Discourses, I, iv, 15.

There was a footnote that was added as an erratum at the end of the book, which led me back to Seneca:

7That is why we give to children a proverb, or that which the Greeks call Chria, to be learned by heart; that sort of thing can be comprehended by the young mind, which cannot as yet hold more. For a man, however, whose progress is definite, to chase after choice extracts and to prop his weakness by the best known and the briefest sayings and to depend upon his memory, is disgraceful; it is time for him to lean on himself. He should make such maxims and not memorize them. For it is disgraceful even for an old man, or one who has sighted old age, to have a note-book knowledge. "This is what Zeno said." But what have you yourself said? "This is the opinion of Cleanthes." But what is your own opinion? How long shall you march under another man's orders? Take command, and utter some word which posterity will remember. 8Put forth something from your own stock. For this reason I hold that there is nothing of eminence in all such men as these, who never create anything themselves, but always lurk in the shadow of others, playing the role of interpreters, never daring to put once into practice what they have been so long in learning. They have exercised their memories on other men's material. But it is one thing to remember, another to know. Remembering is merely safeguarding something entrusted to the memory; knowing, however, means making everything your own; it means not depending upon the copy and not all the time glancing back at the master. 9"Thus said Zeno, thus said Cleanthes, indeed!" Let there be a difference between yourself and your book! How long shall you be a learner? From now on be a teacher as well! "But why," one asks, "should I have to continue hearing lectures on what I can read?" "The living voice," one replies, "is a great help." Perhaps, but not the voice which merely makes itself the mouthpiece of another's words, and only performs the duty of a reporter. Seneca, Epist. 33, 7-9.

This is confirmation of the next level of Stoic training. Beyond the other levels that the College course presents. The course that I, myself, have not completed, not really.

This is what made me realize that I was not there yet. I had not made the effort to reach that level. I was still a Stoic 'child', parroting quotes in my daily blog. The occasional comment notwithstanding, I haven't really even read, let alone written anything.

So I am putting myself through it again. I am going to finish the Arrian exercise, something one of my students has already accomplished. And from there, the Mneme. Then finally, perhaps, I will be able to write for myself.

I write

This month has been an exercise in self discovery. I have been attempting to complete many thoughts, and none of them have yet born mature fruit.

First, there is The Restored Olympian Oracle.This little piece of research has grown in monstrous proportions to occupy almost all of my mind.

Next there is NaNoWriMo. Coupled with the Oracle, I had thought that I could couple the two, and use the impetus of the month to drive the production of the book. While I have been partially successful (approximately 15000 words thus far), it isn't what I really want to write. There are books inside of me that are trying to get out, but are blocked by the Oracle.

And there is the Stoic Order. There is a life in there, a transformation that is waiting to happen and to be shared. I see hints of it from time to time. Suggestions for practices, morning and evening, things that must be done on a monthly or quarterly basis to establish equilibrium. Yet it waits for another.

And there is the Dedicants Program, that which the order waits for. Many small flowers to pick there, small things to write that prove my position on my spiritual path. And where might that be?

The new proto-grove will require an increasing amount of attention as well. More will be needed from us, from our home.

And the Amazon.com ebooks, the  house repairs, exercise, diet, debt, yard work, the future, the past, and my job.

As I said, many things. A now another  "Do this one NOW" has reared it's head.

Final Mneme - The Last SES Assignment

I have been undertaking for the last year or so, a study of Stoic principles through the New Stoa. Today marks the submission of my final exercise, the mneme. This is intended to be a memory aid, of my own creation, to assist me in bringing to mind the principles I have learned through my reading and studies.

The Virtues great today will I express
To choose my acts to benefit mankind
And work to help all men learn happiness
For only then will I find peace of mind

I will my fate entrust to thought Divine
To guide my steps to follow Nature's way
And let my light upon the world to shine
That when I pass I will have lived each day

With clarity all judgements I review
And in the present ever mindful be
That I may always say that which is true
And thus the path to wisdom I will see

These are the words I repeat morning and night, and sometimes throughout the day. They are added to the other reminders I have put in place to keep me conscious of my oaths.

Grace of Gratitude

For food in a world where many walk in hunger
For friends in a world where many live alone
For peace in a world filled with fear and anger
For love and a place that we can call home
For the meal that what we are about to receive
Let us be truly thankful

A New Stoic Practice - Winter Solstice

[As the aim of this series of essays is also to establish a Stoic approach to the received cycle of celebrations, each will in turn present a practice that will seek to honour both the historicity of the celebration, as well as emphasizing a specific Stoic practice. Alignments with current societal practices are deliberate, adding meaning, but not necessarily changing, the habits and rituals that are already in place.]

The occasion of the winter solstice, with it's twin themes of birth and death, is for Stoics a clear reminder of our own mortality. Despite our modern society's obsession with youth and vitality, it is a stark fact that we all must die. The Stoic accepts this, and more, embraces it as a truth, like all others, that is neither good nor evil, but merely factual. For 'death shall have no dominion' over the Stoic, to whom death is a final, natural culmination and release.

Modern Stoics practice daily and weekly resignation, the release of the cares of the present into the hands of fate, or the Gods. The winter solstice is thus the Grand Release, the ultimate Memento Mori (Remember that you will die).

In the weeks approaching the solstice, the Stoic will finalize his or her preparations to depart this life. All small debts will be cleared, if possible. Arrangements for larger debts will made, and Stoic will ensure that all legal obligations and burdens are taken care of, such as the updates to will, testaments, insurances, funeral plans etc.

This is also the time to recognize, honour and celebrate the friendships and relationships that he or she may have. Holiday gatherings, celebrations and the preparation of gifts of gratitude are already part of many cultures' routines for this time of year. The Stoic is glad to participate with them, and understands the depth of meaning that these occasions can hold.

The grand fire, a feature of so many pagan and neo-pagan winter solstice practices, is for the Stoic the funeral pyre, the symbol of the final peaceful release. The Stoic does not, however, call into being the new sun, through sympathetic magic or other rite or ritual. The rising and setting of the sun, and indeed all universal cycles, are part of the logos, the perfect natural symphonic rhythm of which we all are but a single line of  melody.

Should the cycle restart the next day, then the Stoic has cause to celebrate their rebirth. Since all arrangements are already made for their departure, it is with complete freedom that the Stoic is able to join in festivities and joyous gatherings, as in days of old. This is also a time for reflection on the value of his or her life, and the contributions that can be made in the coming year.

With the coming of the new year, and the return to the regular routines of life, the Stoic is prepared to make new commitments, renewing responsibilities from the past year if there is work still to be done. Bearing in mind that all plans are tentative at best (which is seen the practice of Reservation that receives special recognition at the February Cross-Quarter), the Stoic begins the new year with solemn commitments to improve his or her life, and to make real positive change in the world.

More Mneme

The Virtues great will I express 

My actions right and true

To help all men learn happiness

And courage to pursue

I trust Intelligence Divine

To guide all Nature's ways

And make my light to fully shine

Thus peace will fill my days

With care all judgements I review

And ever mindful be

That I may say that which is true

The path to wisdom see

My Mneme

In my efforts to live the excellent aretes, to exercise utmost kathekonta, for the sake of universal oikeiosis,

I have the courage to face the world and its visicitudes.

By my faith in divine logos, my trust in providential phusis and my hope of fulfilling eudaimonia,
I receive the serenity of knowing all is as it should be.

Through my practice of careful aproptôsia, constant prosoché, and proper epilegein

I acquire the wisdom to choose my own path.

Definitions:

aretes = Virtues (sort of) it really means an excellent disposition of the mind, or the healthy and perfect way of being. we use virtuous, but it has some victorian baggage (victorian morality mostly) that is not part of it.

kathekonta = appropriate action, or the correct and right way to do something given all the available choices and options.

oikeiosis = our interconnection to each other and the univers, which brings with it the obligation of care and support.

logos = the active and creative Reason and intelligence that underlies the structure of the universe

phusis = Nature and all of the natural processes, from evolution to growth and change, and that which makes a thing truly what it is.

eudaimonia = flourishing, the fulfillment of our individual natures, being and doing what we are made to be and do, sometimes experienced as joy, caution, hope or flow.

aproptôsia = the Stoic practice of not assenting too quickly to judgements that correspond directly to representations.

prosoché = the exercise of self-attention or mindfulness.

epilegein = to add something to an impression, like "it is a bad thing' or 'i have no control over this'. It can be good or bad, depending on how you use it. (that is why I used the adj. 'proper')

Are we here for a Good Time?

A song was going through my mind this morning. Trooper's "We're Here for a Good Time," and the song follow with 'not a long time.' For some reason I started to think seriously about the implications of these lines.

It is true that we aren't here for long time, relatively speaking. The billions of years that stretch uncaringly on either side of our lives are testament to the brevity of the flicker that is our existence. But, of course, that doesn't invalidate the meaning of that flicker. Duration does NOT equal meaning.

The question then remains, are we here for a good time? Back to this in a moment.

In an effort to find meaning, or at least to quell the chaos, over the years I have searched for the Time Management System, from Covey, to GTD to everything in between. The hope, the aim was that I would find a way to find a way. To manage all the noise so that I could get the right things done. Do the work, clean the yard, read the book. But the real question isn't how to manage my life and time. The real question is, what can I do with my life and time that MATTERS. I can stay busy, but busy at what.

In the grand scheme, if there is one, what is it that I am to do with the small 3 score and 10 I have allotted to me, and that now is over half spent. Am I to merely embrace pleasure, and avoid pain. The Stoic path even points to this, by redefining true pleasure to be eudaimonia. But it amounts to the same thing as Epicureanism, just with the points redefined. Are we here for a "Good Time", however we may define 'Good'?

Is this even the right question? Wherein lies the meaning, the mattering? Where should I be pouring my daily resources and my concious hours? Should I strive to maintain the job I have, so that I can keep paying for the life I have, the house, the kids, food, clothing, bills? Should I leave, seek to fulfill the 'true inner self' and damn all the consequences?

The answer to that question lies partly in compromise, partly in cowardice, and partly in comfort. I WILL keep working at my job, though it is  no longer one that fulfills any direct purpose in my life, to support the choices of the past, the moments of comfort and joy, though they are brief. Perhaps because this is what they call a 'difficult' time.

But there are other things that have filled my time. Things that not part of my comfort, things that do not add to me, but draw from me. The challenge there is that I am loved and admired. And that is a form of repayment. But sometimes it feels like an audience/actor relationship. And it is a large time commitment.

But as I asked Adam, what else would I be doing with my time? Maintaining the house, living the Canadian dream? Waiting to die? What AM I here for? A good time? or a meaningful one?

Towards a Stoic Methodology

Recently, my daughter interviewed me as part of a university project. In it we discussed Stoicism in some detail. She asked me to define Stoicism, and after some round about discussion, I finally came down to this. Stoicism is a Methodology, a WAY to live, not necessarily a set of rules for living. It is all based on 'living according to nature'. First, we must understand what nature is, what OUR nature is, what ALL nature is, then live to the best of our ability according to that knowledge. Stoicism is, in effect, a rational life style that is an extension of scientific discovery. It is life, lived in the best way that we can, in the most rational way we are capable of.

Between Ancient and Dead

Pam and I have been struggling, wrestling even with our search for  Rule of Life that would be rational, compassionate, and fulfilling. Most revealed religions were passed by, not because of their tenets or life-styles, but by the appeal to the supernatural to fill the gaps. Organized atheism and secular humanism spent most of their time focused on religion as well, strangely enough. So when we stumbled upon Stoicism about a decade ago, we though this just might be 'it'. Rational (check) as far as rationality could go. Even the most disruptive emotions were explained by bad judgments. Compassionate (check) because we are all one, each of connected to each other and to the universe itself in a chain of unbroken relationships. And fulfilling (double check) due to some of the most uplifting and beautiful reflections of reality we have ever come across.

Recent events in some Stoic online groups have left the idea of a virtual community in question. The real issue though is the continuing perception that because of the fragmentary nature of the record, the distance in time, place and culture, and more recent theories about optimal human function mean that the Stoic path is not a viable one. Leaving aside the incessant grinding of minutiae on the International Stoic Forum, there is some validity to these concerns.

But here is the reality. Stoicism isn't a religion, with the need for plenary innerancy in it's supporting documents. Nor does it require flawless saints and leaders to shepherd the hapless flock. It is a series of documents, letters, journals, student notes, with common themes. That we can live our lives rationally, without fear or apprehension, without debilitating grief or guilt, and with joy and optimism. That we can love and give with great compassion, because it is what we do that matters, not whether some other deserves eternal punishment for abrogating some minute religious law, and that each day is an opportunity to challenge the 'that is the way it has always been' as well as the vicissitudes of fate. That we can be fulfilled, mindful of the present blessings, understanding beauty and goodness, feeling life all around us, and being grateful for the moment.

This is was Stoicism has offered us. This is living philosophy, and a philosophy of life. While it is ancient, it is also growing, and changing, and making lives meaningful today.

Stoic Poetry

As you may (or may not know, and may or may not care) I am an amateur poet (some would consider me a rank amateur). I recently came across a truly horrible little book, where the author had attempted to convert passages of Marcus Aurelius into verse. Of course, I immediately decided to join him (well, not immediately). While reading Seneca (Loeb edition - R. Gummere trans.), I came across a passage that had a very poetic feel to it. So, of course, since I am not one to leave well enough alone, I have expressed the passage in Sonnet (modified Petrarchan, if anyone cares).

What follows is the passage then the poem.

"And so we should love all of our dear ones, both those whom, by the condition of birth, we hope will survive us, and those whose own most just prayer is to pass on before us, but always with the thought that we have no promise that we may keep them forever -nay, no promise even that we may keep them for long. Often must the heart be reminded - it must remember that loved objects will surely leave, nay,  are already leaving. Take whatever Fortune gives, remembering that it has no voucher. Snatch the pleasures your children bring, let your children, in turn, find delight in you, and drain joy to the dregs without delay; no promise has been given you for this night - nay, I have offered too long a respite! - no promise has been given even for this hour."

SENECA: TO MARCIA ON CONSOLATION, x. 3, 4

Fortune's Gifts

So we should love those dearest to our heart,
Both young and old, whose lives we would prolong.
No hope have we that we will never part, 

None even that we keep them very long.

How often must the heart reminded be
that those we love will surely someday leave?
They are already leaving, don't you see?
For Fortune’s gifts no voucher we receive.

So drain the cup of joy without delay,
No promise has been given for this night.
Nay, I have offered too long a respite!
No promise has been given for this day!

Snatch now the pleasures that your children bring
That through delight in you their hearts can sing!